What is a reflexive pronoun?

A reflexive pronoun is a pronoun ending in -self or -selves that refers back to the subject of the clause. In She hurt herself, the subject and the object are the same person, so herself is required. There are eight: myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, and themselves.

What is the difference between myself and me?

Me is the ordinary object pronoun and myself is reflexive, so myself is correct only when I is the subject of the same clause: I bought myself a coat. When someone else is the subject, use me: She bought me a coat. Send the file to Tom or me. Myself can also add emphasis after I: I spoke to her myself.

Do you say I wash myself or I wash in English?

Normally I wash, I shave, I get dressed, with no reflexive. English treats daily routines as things you simply do, not as actions on yourself, which is different from French, German, or Italian. You add the reflexive only to stress independence or effort: He's only three, but he can dress himself.

What is the difference between themselves and each other?

Themselves points the action back at the same people: The kids dried themselves after the swim. Each other passes the action between them: The kids splashed each other. If you can picture the action crossing from one person to the other, each other is right; if every person acts on their own body or mind, use themselves.

Can I use a reflexive pronoun as the subject of a sentence?

No. Myself and the other reflexives cannot be subjects: Myself and Anna went to the market is wrong, and Anna and I went to the market is right. A reflexive can follow a subject for emphasis (I myself have doubts), but the subject pronoun has to be there too.

English grammar · Intermediate

Reflexive Pronouns: Myself, Yourself, Themselves, and How to Use Them

Written by Eleanor Whitfield, Lead English Curriculum Editor · Reviewed September 2026

A reflexive pronoun ends in -self or -selves: myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves. You use one when the object of a verb or preposition is the same person or thing as the subject (he cut himself), and also for emphasis, to stress that someone did something personally or without help (I fixed it myself). English uses reflexives far less than most European languages, so knowing when not to use one matters as much as knowing the forms.

She taught herself to play the guitar.

subject and object are the same person

What it is

A reflexive pronoun sends the action back to the subject. In He cut himself, the person cutting and the person cut are the same, and himself is what tells you so; He cut him would mean a different man. English needs a separate set of forms for this because its ordinary object pronouns (me, him, them) always point at somebody else. The same eight words have a second job as emphatic pronouns: The manager herself apologised stresses that it was the manager in person.

I looked at myself in the mirror. (I am both the looker and the one looked at.) I painted the room myself. (Emphasis: I did it, nobody else.)

How to spot it

Check who the object is. If the object of the verb or preposition is the same person as the subject, you need -self or -selves. If the pronoun can be removed and the sentence still makes complete sense, it is the emphatic use. If the object is a different person, an ordinary object pronoun is right and a reflexive is wrong.

He introduced himself to the group. (he introduced he: same person, so himself)
He introduced him to the group. (him is a different man: object pronoun)
We built the shed ourselves. (removable, so emphatic use)
Help yourselves to some cake. (plural you takes yourselves)

The forms are built on the possessive for first and second person (my-self, your-self, our-selves) but on the object pronoun for third person (him-self, them-selves). Hisself and theirselves are not standard English.

Reflexive Pronouns Quick Reference

The eight reflexive pronouns

Subject	Reflexive pronoun	Example
I	myself	I hurt myself playing football.
you (one person)	yourself	Did you make this yourself?
he	himself	He blamed himself for the mistake.
she	herself	She bought herself a new laptop.
it	itself	The door locks itself.
we	ourselves	We treated ourselves to dinner.
you (more than one)	yourselves	Make yourselves at home.
they	themselves	They organised the whole trip themselves.

Common Reflexive Pronouns Examples in English

The two main jobs of a reflexive pronoun, plus the two places where learners are most tempted to use one wrongly:

Reflexive: Subject and Object Are the Same

I cut myself while chopping onions.: I did the cutting and got cut
She reminded herself to call the bank.: the reminder went to the same person
The cat is cleaning itself.: itself for animals and things
They blamed themselves for the delay.: plural subject, plural -selves
You should be proud of yourself.: object of a preposition, same person as the subject

Without the reflexive, the meaning changes: She reminded her means two different women.

Emphatic: Stressing Who Did It

I made this cake myself.: nobody helped me
The director herself answered the phone.: straight after the noun: that person, surprisingly
You'll have to ask them yourself.: you personally, not through me
The house itself is small, but the garden is huge.: the house as opposed to what surrounds it

Emphatic pronouns go straight after the noun they stress or at the end of the clause, and the sentence survives without them.

After Prepositions

He talked to himself all the way home.: the listener is the speaker
Take care of yourself.: the person cared for is you
She looked at herself in the shop window.: same person on both sides of at
I brought a jacket with me.: no reflexive after prepositions of place or accompaniment

After beside, next to, behind, and with in the sense of carrying, English keeps the ordinary object pronoun: She had no money with her.

Everyday Verbs That Take a Reflexive

Enjoy yourself tonight.: enjoy needs an object, so the reflexive fills it
Help yourself to a drink.: fixed phrase: take what you want
Behave yourselves while I'm out.: behave works with or without the reflexive
Please make yourself at home.: a fixed welcome

Enjoy is the key one: it must have an object, so Did you enjoy? is incomplete. Did you enjoy yourself? or Did you enjoy it? are the options.

How Reflexive Pronouns Work

Five rules cover the forms, the two uses, and the verbs where other languages use a reflexive and English does not.

Match the Reflexive to the Subject

The reflexive agrees with the subject in person, number, and gender: I takes myself, she takes herself, they takes themselves. You has two forms, yourself for one person and yourselves for more than one, which is one of the few places English still marks singular and plural you.

Sit down and make yourself comfortable. Sit down and make yourselves comfortable.

one guest, then several guests

-self for one, -selves for more than one.

Use It Only When Subject and Object Are the Same

If the person receiving the action is anyone other than the subject, the ordinary object pronoun is the only correct choice. Learners often hear myself as more polite or more formal than me, but Please contact John or myself is an error in standard grammar: the subject is not I, so nothing is reflexive.

Please contact John or me. I'll contact him myself.

me because the subject is you; myself only where I is the subject

No I in the subject, no myself in the object.

Many Verbs Are Reflexive Elsewhere but Not in English

Verbs for daily routines and changes of state (wash, shave, dress, relax, concentrate, feel, sit down, get up, wake up, remember, worry) take a reflexive pronoun in French, Spanish, German, Italian, and many other languages. In English they normally stand alone: I feel tired, not I feel myself tired. A reflexive is possible with wash, shave, and dress only when you want to stress the effort, for example with a small child or an injured person.

I got up, showered, dressed, and tried to relax before the interview.

four verbs, no reflexive pronoun anywhere

Routine verbs: no -self in English.

Emphatic Reflexives Are Optional and Movable

When the reflexive means in person or without help, it is an extra rather than a required object. It sits right after the noun it stresses (the president himself) or at the end of the clause (I'll do it myself). Removing it leaves a complete sentence, which is the quickest way to tell the emphatic use from the reflexive one.

The chef himself brought out the dessert. She wrote the whole report herself.

both sentences still work without the reflexive

If it can go, it is emphatic.

Each Other Is Not Themselves

When two or more people do something to one another, English uses the reciprocal each other or one another, not a reflexive. They looked at themselves means each person looked at their own reflection; They looked at each other means their eyes met.

The twins blamed each other. The twins blamed themselves.

each blamed the other vs. each blamed their own self

Two-way action = each other.

Common Mistakes with Reflexive Pronouns

Incorrect: I feel myself very tired today.

Correct: I feel very tired today.

Feel is not reflexive in English when it describes your state; feel myself would mean physically touching myself. This is one of the most common transfers from languages where feel takes a reflexive pronoun.

Incorrect: If you have any questions, ask Sarah or myself.

Correct: If you have any questions, ask Sarah or me.

The subject of ask is you, so nothing points back to I, and the object must be the ordinary pronoun me. Myself as a polite substitute for me is widespread in business emails, but it is not standard grammar.

Incorrect: The two friends hugged themselves at the airport.

Correct: The two friends hugged each other at the airport.

Hugged themselves describes two people each wrapping their own arms around their own body. When the action passes between two people, English needs the reciprocal each other or one another.

Incorrect: He did it hisself.

Correct: He did it himself.

Third-person reflexives are built on the object pronoun (him, them), not the possessive: himself and themselves. Hisself and theirselves are heard in some dialects but are not standard written English.

By Myself and Fixed Expressions

A handful of set phrases use the reflexive forms with meanings you cannot work out from the parts.

By myself, by yourself, by themselves

By plus a reflexive means alone or without help, depending on the verb. It is the standard way to say that someone was on their own.

She lives by herself.: alone
He assembled the wardrobe by himself.: without anyone's help
Do you like travelling by yourself?: on your own

On my own means the same and is just as common: I did it on my own.

Other set phrases

These expressions are fixed; learn them as units rather than building them from the rule.

Help yourself.: take what you want without asking
I'm not feeling myself today.: I don't feel my normal self
The problem solved itself.: was resolved without anyone acting

In itself means considered alone: The idea is not bad in itself, but the timing is wrong.

Quick Check: Reflexive Pronouns

Fill each gap with a reflexive pronoun, an object pronoun, each other, or nothing at all.

1. She looked at ___ in the mirror and sighed.

Answer: herself

she is both looker and looked at

2. My parents met ___ at university.

Answer: each other

the meeting was mutual, not reflexive

3. Did you paint the fence ___?

Answer: yourself

emphatic: without help

4. Sit down and relax ___ for a while.

Answer: nothing (relax for a while)

relax is not reflexive in English

5. He asked his sister to help ___ with the move.

Answer: him

the helper is his sister, so him, not himself

6. The children are old enough to look after ___.

Answer: themselves

the children look after the children

Reflexive Pronouns FAQs

What is a reflexive pronoun?: A reflexive pronoun is a pronoun ending in -self or -selves that refers back to the subject of the clause. In She hurt herself, the subject and the object are the same person, so herself is required. There are eight: myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, and themselves.
What is the difference between myself and me?: Me is the ordinary object pronoun and myself is reflexive, so myself is correct only when I is the subject of the same clause: I bought myself a coat. When someone else is the subject, use me: She bought me a coat. Send the file to Tom or me. Myself can also add emphasis after I: I spoke to her myself.
Do you say I wash myself or I wash in English?: Normally I wash, I shave, I get dressed, with no reflexive. English treats daily routines as things you simply do, not as actions on yourself, which is different from French, German, or Italian. You add the reflexive only to stress independence or effort: He's only three, but he can dress himself.
What is the difference between themselves and each other?: Themselves points the action back at the same people: The kids dried themselves after the swim. Each other passes the action between them: The kids splashed each other. If you can picture the action crossing from one person to the other, each other is right; if every person acts on their own body or mind, use themselves.
Can I use a reflexive pronoun as the subject of a sentence?: No. Myself and the other reflexives cannot be subjects: Myself and Anna went to the market is wrong, and Anna and I went to the market is right. A reflexive can follow a subject for emphasis (I myself have doubts), but the subject pronoun has to be there too.